Category: Mental Health

‘The Fell’ – Sarah Moss

Living in the environment in which this is set, The Fell seemed as if it would encapsulate so much of my own feelings/experiences that I hoped this would be a book I found myself falling in love with. I wasn’t disappointed.

The story is deceptively simple. A mother, Kate, finding the restrictions of lockdown mentally challenging is struggling with the demands of a period of enforced self-isolation. Though it’s illegal, one afternoon she takes her backpack and walks out onto the hills of the Peak District. She doesn’t tell her teenage son she is going, a neighbour sees her leave and says nothing, but when she doesn’t return and night is drawing in the choice is made to call out Mountain Rescue.

Fragments of thoughts and we get a range of perspectives as the hunt for Kate goes through the night. We read the thoughts of Kate, her son, the neighbour – Alice, and mountain rescue volunteer Rob. It was surprisingly easy to read about the thoughts and feelings of each towards the lockdown of November 2020. The nuances of each characters’ reactions to events was well-captured, and though much of the focus tended to the mundane I felt it was an approach that allowed us to reflect on the ideas explored. Where this book won me over was with the descriptions of an environment which I deeply love, but also respect…knowing just how easily it can go wrong.

Thank you to Picador and NetGalley for granting me the opportunity to read this in advance of publication. I’ve already reserved a physical copy and can see myself re-reading this.

‘The Taking of Jake Livingston’ – Ryan Douglass


Jake Livingston is one of the only black kids in his school. The other is his popular older brother. Jake is reserved, finds it hard to interact with others and when a lot of your time is spent seeing dead people I imagine it’s hard to deal with the real world. This alone would make Jake’s high school experience a challenge, but Jake is also having to come to terms with being gay, and when we later learn about how his now-absent father responded to this years earlier his reticence is understandable.
From the outset we were encouraged to get into Jake’s head and try to understand his experience. We watch the micro aggressions in school, and we see how these are affecting him. This seems quite familiar territory, but the book is very far from familiar.
With its focus on spirits and the main character being a medium, this was always going to be something a little different. Alongside Jake’s experiences, we are also given chapters by a character called Sawyer. This is a character who is receiving treatment for potential depression and who seems to have little support around him. We may be tempted to feel some sympathy for him, particularly later in the book when he experiences some deeply concerning events, but he was a character I found it hard to feel anything positive about as he is so skewed in his attitudes to others. As we also have Jake’s experience alongside we learn that Sawyer is – in the present – actually a ghost, a malevolent force who in life gunned down several of his peers, killed himself and now appears to be haunting those who survived.
Learning that Sawyer is determined to cause trouble, and Jake is going to be the vessel through which he achieves this, lent a much darker tone to the book than I expected. When we get into scenes of possession, I admit to being not only spooked by the events described but also very very confused. There were considerable sections where I really could not say with certainty what was happening.
I may be wholly off in my reading of this, but the spirit possession and the scenes towards the end seemed (at least they did at the time of reading) to be some form of symbolic representation of Jake’s struggle to come to terms with his self-identity. Perhaps this was not the case, but by the end I did feel Jake had found some clarity about himself and how he might be in the future.

 

‘At the End of Everything’ – Marieke Nijkamp

Thanks to NetGalley for allowing me to read this prior to its January 2022 publication. Finding yourself caught up in an event of such magnitude is not something you could, generally, prepare for…but the events of recent years have, I think understandably, made people reflect on what they might do in such a situation and what is important to them.

Our story is set principally in the Hope Juvenile Treatment Centre, a place where those teens people don’t know what to do with are dumped. Nobody really notices them, nobody cares about them…and they are abandoned when the guards receive notice of an infectious disease spreading outside.

The book opens with establishing the hierarchy within the Centre, and introducing us to some of the key characters. Once the teens discover they have been left alone, the book focuses on their immediate reaction, the challenge to establish some sense of normalcy within the group and their ongoing attempts to survive in the face of something they have no idea how to beat.

After an attempted break-out results in the death of one of their party, and the realisation that they have been abandoned, those that remain in Hope are shown working out how to survive. There is the very real fear of catching the disease, there’s the reality of coping with an unknown situation and there’s the ongoing issues that come with having to trust people you don’t necessarily feel able to trust.

The book shows teens coping in adverse circumstances – and doing a much better job of it than many adults. We also get to see some of our core group learning about themselves and how to cope with some of their own issues that may impact on their lives outside. Not everything ends well, but there is a sense of resolve and optimism that remains throughout.

‘Can’t Take That Away’ – Steven Salvatore

This was a book that I picked up out of curiosity and feeling the need to raise my own awareness. As a teacher I am, more than anything, struck by the difference this shows educators can make to the experience of those in their care and am horrified that such bigoted views as those expressed by Mr Jackson and Max could be tolerated and supported. It certainly made me think about how each of us can play our part in creating a community where everyone within it feels safe enough to be themselves.

The main character of Carey Parker is one that engaged and infuriated me in equal measure. I felt so angry on their behalf that they would have to endure some of the things they experienced, pride that they found the strength to be themselves and allow others to support them and utterly exasperated by their inability to be honest at times with those who meant so much to them.

The story is quite straightforward. Carey is genderqueer, and in a bid to regain some of the power they feel they have surrendered they audition for a part in their school musical. This sets up a quite remarkable chain of events culminating in a nationally-noticed protest about the discrimination evident in their school and a ‘treat’ of meeting their heroine Mariah Carey. Along the way we focus on their shifting friendships and some major life events involving their grandmother.

I’d love to say this book isn’t necessary, but that isn’t the case. It was informative, engaging in showing a young person coming of age and developing in confidence and certainly one to get people talking.

 

‘In the Wild Light’ – Jeff Zentner

In the Wild Light is a book that I’m going to have to recommend with caution. I imagine anyone who picks it up will enjoy it, but this book – in the right hands – has the capacity to break someone time and time again, before slotting the broken bits back together and forging something new. Yes, this is going to be a book that I know I’ll read again (and that doesn’t happen often), will find ways to use excerpts from in class and will always wish I could recapture the feelings I had as I read it for the first time.

Our main characters, Cash and Delaney, come from a small town called Sawyer in Tennessee. Cash lives with his grandparents after the overdose of his mother, and Delaney’s mother seems to be heading the same way. Cash’s grandfather is dying of emphysema, and the pair of them are coming under pressure from a local dealer to get involved in things they’d rather avoid. At the start of the book I was convinced this would be bleak reading.

We are told early on that Delaney has made an important scientific discovery. How big a thing this is doesn’t become obvious until we’re told that she has an exclusive prep school offering both her and Cash full scholarships to study there. Though they have reservations about leaving at such a time, they are encouraged to break out of their home environment and take a risk.

The opportunity to study at such an establishment cannot be ignored. It changes them both in ways they could never have foreseen, but it also allows them to reflect on what they have come from and what is important to each of them.

There were so many passages and moments within the book that I loved that it’s hard to focus on specifics. The friendship between Delaney and Cash is at the heart of the book, but they would not be where they are without the support of Cash’s grandparents. The professor who fosters Cash’s ability to write was inspiring, and each of the students Cash and Delaney find themselves befriending had something about them. The story is quite simple, but the way in which is written is achingly beautiful. Though I was expecting some of the bleak moments, there were more…but, at its core, there was a strong sense of hope that cannot be ignored.

Jeff Zentner has created a story that goes beyond the boundaries of the page. It’s a love story, testimony to the power of friendship, family and environment. It’s a story that cannot be forgotten.

Thanks to NetGalley for allowing me the opportunity to read this in advance of its August release.

 

‘The Heart Principle’ – Helen Hoang

Due for publication in August 2021, I’m very grateful to NetGalley for letting me read this before publication. I’ve enjoyed the previous two books in the series, but this one touched me in ways I wasn’t expecting. It felt honest, painfully so at times, but it was such a tender read that I found myself desperate to see how things worked out.

Our focus this time round is Quan, who we already know from the previous books, and his romance with violinist Anna.

Anna is a woman who sets herself high standards. She feels pressure to behave a certain way and her usual coping mechanisms are not working. Close to burnout it’s hard to imagine being at a lower point. But then her boyfriend suggests they take a break from each other and start an open relationship to help them figure out whether they’re really suited to one another. Perhaps it’s the way we’re encouraged to respond to him, but this just felt like a way for him to sow his wild oats without losing Anna. He never imagines she might be the one to move on.

When the open relationship thing is first introduced, she doesn’t know how to react. Her friends’ righteous indignation is just what was needed…setting things up perfectly for her to meet Quan.

Of course we want them to work out, and their relationship definitely ticks the boxes, but what I really loved about this was the way the pair of them together talked, shared their vulnerabilities and worked on ways to resolve problems.

Quan is invaluable support for Anna as she comes to terms with her late diagnosis of autism, and how she manages the expectations of others while working out the implications for herself. At the same time, Anna is having to cope with the demands of caring for her father and how these new responsibilities affect her and her family.

As I said, there’s a lot to digest here. Some issues are resolved, while others are not. Though there’s so much going on in this story it never felt cluttered or disorganised. Each strand combined perfectly to create a story that I defy people not to fall in love with.

 

‘Unsettled Ground’ – Claire Fuller

Unsettled Ground tells the story of a family bound together by tragedy. Dot, the matriarch, has always had a clear set of rules that the family have to live by. Since the death of her husband she has lived in a remote cottage with her twins, Jeanie and Julius. Self-sufficient, they have always shied away from village life. However, when Dot dies of a stroke she leaves the twins alone for the first time in their lives.

Jeanie and Julius are fifty-one, but have never lived apart. They are – for reasons that become clear – quite dependent on one another. After the unexpected death of their mother they come to learn just how harshly life can treat you.

Upon their mother’s death they learn that she wasn’t entirely honest about their situation. They find themselves with ‘friends’ demanding money to repay debts they didn’t know they had. Soon they find themselves evicted from the one family home they know, and scrabbling to survive.

It is clear that both Jeanie and Julius have difficulties in living a normal life. Jeanie can’t read or write, but the spirit and resolve each shows is quite remarkable. Sadly, their self-reliance seems unnecessary and as the book progresses – and we learn more about their history – it is painfully apparent that this need not have been their life.

As soon as I began reading I was struck by the beauty of the writing about the everyday experiences. Though focusing on a very miserable subject, there was an inner strength to this that I couldn’t help but admire. It reminded me in parts of Bruce Chatwin’s On the Black Hill, and left me with a similar feeling of unease upon finishing.

 

‘As Good as Dead’ – Holly Jackson

When I finished Book Two in the series I was struck by the shift into darkness – perhaps inevitable for a true crime focus – but nothing prepared me for the developments we see in As Good as Dead. In this stunning finale to the trilogy (and, boy, does that pain me to write) Pip is thrust into a position it’s hard to imagine…and nobody could come out of that unscathed.

When the book opens, Pip is preparing for her new life at Cambridge. Superficially, her life is good, but the signs are there that events have taken their toll. Pip is far from alright. She’s not sleeping, her nerves are shredded and she seems to be developing a sense of paranoia when she is convinced that the little chalk figures appearing on her driveway, the online death threats and the nuisance phone calls she is receiving are connected. In spite of promises to her parents, Pip needs something to take her mind off things…so she turns to what she knows best. Murders.

 

Pip starts looking into the stalking incidents that the police refuse to take seriously. They share an alarming link with the profile attributed to the DT killer, a recent case where five young women were found murdered. But the DT killer has been behind bars for six years. He confessed, so it can’t be him.

If someone were in this situation they might be reassured, but not Pip. She is unsettled by the links and digs deeper. What if the confession was, as the killer’s mother is convinced, given under duress? Could the real DT killer still be at large? Could Pip be the killer’s intended sixth victim?

This is the point that I give no more details, as the enjoyment of this story really does come from following Pip on her journey and being given access to her thought process as the events she has started to investigate take an incredibly personal – and increasingly sinister – turn. I was – on more than one occasion – stunned by what I was reading. It is haunting, and made me review my thoughts on certain characters and even the events covered in the previous books in the series. When this is published in August I cannot wait to see the reactions…

Holly Jackson, I never imagined you’d go there…what a character you have made us come to love (which makes the events of this book even more difficult to process) and I am so grateful to the publishers and NetGalley for allowing me the opportunity to read this prior to publication.

 

‘The Push’ – Ashley Audrain

The Push is a dark psychological study and it covers areas that could trigger many readers, but its key focus is the exploration of the bonds between mothers and daughters. It is far from comfortable reading, and I always felt slightly on edge – never certain to what extent these ideas were based in reality, and what was the product of a disturbed mind.
Our main character is Blythe, a young woman who reluctantly becomes a mother. She doubts herself and her capabilities, constantly feels judged by her ‘perfect’ mother-in-law and worries about the lack of maternal love she feels for her daughter, Violet. Her husband, Fox, seems a natural father and his relationship with Violet is a stark contrast to the one Blythe has. When I read these opening chapters, I really felt for Blythe and wondered how much of her discomfort stemmed from the novelty of her situation.
As the story progresses we learn more about Blythe’s life and the abuse she experienced at the hands of her own mother. Can she be blamed for not feeling comfortable in a role that she has been ill-equipped for?
The novel shows us Blythe’s increasingly dark concerns about her daughter. Mystery accidents that befall children she’s near, things going missing and the callous disdain shown her mother by Violet. She’s so young, but her behaviour is eerily adult. It seemed almost too much at times and it’s very hard to determine how much is in Blythe’s head because we only see her perspective.
Determined to try and make a better job second time round, Blythe pushes for a second child. Sam is a very different character, and Blythe has no issues bonding with him…but when tragedy strikes it’s hard not to wonder exactly what has happened.
I found myself desperate not to believe the worst of either character, and incredibly frustrated by the lack of support shown by those who are meant to be looking out for and caring for their loved ones.
We start to reach an uneasy truce, where it seems both are moving forward and learning to accept their shortcomings. Then came that awful ending, where my heart was in my mouth and I immediately jumped to the conclusion (as I’m sure I’m meant to) that perhaps what we’d been reading was a very deliberate study of someone incredibly dangerous.

 

‘Tell Me When You Feel Something’ – Vicki Grant

A charismatic female student is in a coma. Drugs are rumoured to be involved, but everyone who knows Viv maintains she would never touch drugs. So, what happened?

We learn the shocking truth as we flit between the stories of Viv and her friends. Piece by piece we get to put the story together..and it’s not a pleasant one.

The common factor in the story is the fact that people have secrets they don’t want to share with others. Some of those secrets are more dangerous than others, but – combined –  they create a toxic environment.

Initially it seemed we were being encouraged to see this as a love triangle gone wrong. The home situation of Viv made it all too easy to see how some of this was not seen earlier. There’s a few red herrings thrown in to suggest alternate stories…but I did suspect the truth from quite early on and it became a case of waiting to see how the strands would fit together.

This is certainly a story that will have appeal to many, but there are potentially triggering experiences that could have been better signalled. Thanks to the publishers and NetGalley for granting me access to this prior to publication.